We were recently at a wedding and when we stood for the bride to come down the aisle, I captured this engaging picture of two little girls in the pew behind us “looking with great anticipation to see the bride.”
Don’t we all feel like this looking for the beautiful bride? This picture seems to sweetly express that feeling of anticipation when looking forward to something special: a birthday, a vacation, a dinner party, an adult-only night out, a family reunion, the end of a hectic holiday season, a new year or in my case, reconnecting with a former Kindergarten student of mine.
Several months ago out of the blue, Elsa Rose found my contact information and reached out to me after moving back to Indianapolis and we enjoyed lunch together at Patchou at the Crossing. Now a practiced mom who home-schools her 6 children ranging from 4-18 years old, you can imagine how complimented I felt when she wanted to reconnect. Her family was one with whom I maintained a friendship for many years as I also had taught her brother David and sister, Maria. Over the years, I lost touch with her mom for whom I had great respect and who I had referenced in an article I wrote in July 2017 well before Elsa Rose called that you can read below.
Elsa and I had lunch again a couple of Saturdays ago, and I think we could have talked for the entire afternoon. She offered to bring me her “world famous” brownies when our moving process is complete. I look forward to seeing her again AND the chocolate!
Best holiday wishes to you and your families!
Ginny Hacker, Director
You can’t teach someone to swim when they are drowning.
Eric Carle is a long-time favorite author and illustrator for both children and adults. One of my recent reads to my 2 ½ year old grandkids is a well-worn The Grouchy Ladybug. In it two ladybugs meet one early morning on a leaf covered with aphids. The one who arrived first invited the second one to partake, but the Grouchy Ladybug wants them all and wants to fight for them. The Grouchy Ladybug decides the first ladybug isn’t big enough, so off it flies to encounter and challenge gradually larger creatures until it meets a whale who promptly slaps the Grouchy Ladybug back to the leaf where it started. Sufficiently chastised after a discouraging day, the Grouchy Ladybug is welcomed back for supper with more than enough aphids for both ladybugs.
Lesson: Can’t teach a lesson when emotions are extreme.
When I taught kindergarten, I had children from a favorite family several years in a row and I became friends with the mom. I so admired Maria that I asked her for advice at one frustrating point in my early mommy-hood. She said, “You can’t teach someone to swim when they are drowning.”
It was a mantra that long served me in parenting when my boys’ (and my) frustration was high.
No one is reasonable when emotions are in overdrive. I remember another valuable piece of advice from favorite child psychologist who was speaker on the preschool circuit in the 80s. When those emotions are high for both the adult and child it’s important to remember, “Who is the grownup here?”
GREAT question! That put a very clear perspective for me on problem solving.
Remember these responses when you feel yourself escalating to an unproductive level:
- Let’s talk later when both of us have calmed down.
- I don’t want to say something I don’t mean.
- I respect you too much to argue now.
Important teachable moment conversations need to be had when emotions are even tempered and minds are open to new lessons.
That’s when the best teaching happens.